Me vs. the bat

Bats are fascinating creatures. And kinda cute in a strange, twisted sorta way. I know a lot about bats--I watch the discovery planet and animal planet and such. I know that they very rarely actually carry rabies and that they are intelligent and they don't suck blood and they don't particularly care about humans in general. See, very knowledgeable and analytical--in theory. In reality, not so much.
Several years ago I had a bat get into my apartment. In theory, I should have found a humane and non-traumatic way to simply guide him out the back door. Didn't happen. That tiny little bat swooped in front of my TV and I freaked. I pulled the blanket over my head and screeched like a little girl. So, I'm under the blanket and I'm thinking "It's just a little bat you big pansy! Calm down!" Well, I didn't listen to me very well but I did try to quit screeching like some deranged school girl.
Gradually, as my brain began functioning beyond primitive sissy girl level, I started forming a plan. I decided that I would wait for the bat to land on my blanket, throw the blanket over it, wad up the blanket and chuck bat and blanket out the door. Yeah, sure--great plan, right? Again, didn't happen. The second my little winged visitor landed on that blanket I started spazing out entirely. My hands and feet started flapping like beached fish and I resumed my high-pitched ear-drum-piercing screeching. It is likely that I scared the ever lovin' crap outta that poor bat. And anyone who tries to give me that crap about the bat being more afraid of me than I was of him---not a chance in hell dude. That bat probably spent the whole night laughing at my chickenshit-ness.
For the first time in my entire life, I slept with the blanket pulled over my head. I didn't even do that when I was 6 and absolutely convinced that the boogeymonster was lying in wait under my bed for cripes sake! But I did it to hide from a bat that was roughly the size of a matchbox car. I have mentioned the chickenshit gene flowing strongly and cheerfully through my veins, right?
The final insult was that the bat disappeared by the time I woke up the next morning. I tantrumed my boyfriend and my landlord into searching the entire apartment for that little bugger. They found no trace of him--and told me so while giving me looks that clearly stated they thought I was imagining things. Darn bat.