Funny vs. Pathetic

I went to the video store to rent movies tonight. I do that a lot because I am a loser and I have no life. But it's cool. I'm totally in the know about all the latest and greatest flicks. So that's something. Anywho, I wandered around the store trying to decide which movies I was in the mood for. I had wandered from the Zs all the way to the Cs when the store manager dude popped up in front of me. He asked if I needed any help and I told him I was just dandy. Then he asked if I had seen the movie Captivity yet. When I told him no he promptly plopped the movie on top of my stack of movies and informed me it is right up my ally. He said I definitely wanted that one, everybody wants that one. Cause it is "like Hostel or Saw and stuff like that", stuff folks like me dig. I thanked him and started toward the register. Then I hear some dude ask the manager dude if he has any copies of Captivity left and manager dude tell him he just gave out the only copy they had in tonight. Now, I was all impressed with my own influence type thing with manager dude--I mean the dude knows what kind of movie I like and makes sure I get the best of the sick twisted flicks available. Cool huh? Kinda. You see, after a moment it hit me that this may be less cool than I originally thought. It may signify that I am so pathetic and so without a life that I actually frequent the video store enough that I am becoming sort of a fixture. I'm not sure how I feel about this. Am I pathetic? Or was the little video store incident just the stuff of goofy anecdotes? Puzzling. Regardless, I shall let you know if the movie is cool or not.

I completely and utterly loathe homework.

Silence! I keeell you!

Marginally meaningful meandering mutterings

I have decided that I am one gazillion percent sure that I am never ever ever never going to have children. I know, I know I have mentioned this before. I just feel that it is necessary to reiterate this every once in a while. You see, if you have kids you have to spend quality time with them and do stuff they want that not only doesn't benefit you at all, it pretty much sucks big hairy butt. Like trick or treating. In the cold. Surrounded by zillions of rotten little snot children. In the cold. With complaints assailing your frozen ears nonstop. In the cold. I think next year I shall suggest to the Midget that she check into this church Halloween party thing Dori attends with the Rockstar and the Dinosaur. It sounds warm. I think the adults that deal with the kid crap should get something out of it. And don't give me any of that sentimental jargon about the joy of spending quality time and such. That is total crap. That whole quality time stuff would take place somewhere warm and involve fun activities like coloring or watching a good zombie flick with a kid or giving a kid tons of sugar just to watch them bounce around or jumping out at them and making the little snot jump a foot. (another reason I should be encouraged not to reproduce; I have a slightly skewed view of good child care skills.) Anyway, back to real rewards. I think we should get 50% of their loot on any given holiday that we are forced to endure unpleasant activities of their choosing. And we pick the 50% we get. None of this letting them gives up the crap they don't want. And for all other unpleasant yucky times we must endure we should get paid. A lot. So there.

I really loathe homework.

I am really going to try blogging more. Really.

I think I got tagged or something. I think I'm supposed to list three things I haven't let go of. Or something like that. Maybe it was three things I just don't want to let go of. Or three things I can't let go of. Aw heck, I don't remember. (I know, shocking!) So let's go with three things I just can't seem to let go of. Close enough.

1. My sentimental value stuff. You know the stuff I mean. "I can't get rid of that! My 13th cousin twice removed's best friend's aunt's gardener's daughter's son gave it to me! It has sentimental value!" Seriously, I am way pathetic about all the sentimental crap I have accumulated over the course of my 30 (and 1/2!) years. I have junk that I can't even remember where it came from, I just know it's sentimental value type stuff--someone, possibly someone I like but maybe not, gave it to me and I am just sure I must keep it forever. And don't even get me started on pictures!

2. My Mountain Dew addiction. I will give up MD when you pry my last bottle from my cold dead hand. I am working hard on giving up smoking so people better not even consider asking me to give up MD. It would get very ugly. Police would be called. And a coroner. I promise.

Knock knock. Who's there? Me, I kill you.

3. My tendency to expect too much from myself. Anyone else can get a B in a class and I think it's great. I get a B and I think I should be smacked about the head with a brick. A bit of a double standard I know. But there it is.

My cats are so cute.

I am considering taking drastic measures to solve my Gali vs. Christmas tree dilemma. Gali is, by nature, a VERY curious cat. VERY. So I am getting a bit concerned as to what his reaction will be to a Christmas tree. So here's what I'm thinking. Duct tape. Eh, what d'ya think? Oh for goodness sake, it would be for the tree! Not the cat! Sick bastards. I am thinking of duct taping the tree to my currently unused dinning room table. See, I figure if I duct tape it to the table really really really well, he can't knock it over. And I'm going to put the tree up this weekend so he has plenty of time to get used to the tree before I decorate it the day after Thanksgiving. Wish me luck!

Good Evening. Infidel.

One final mucho importante thing-----TYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTY to Dori for suggesting my new tag line bye bye note thingy I shall be using from this blog on. TYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTY! You so totally rule dude!

That's it for tonight folks!

Silence! I kill you! <-------ain't it great?!?!?!?!?! TY again Dori!